Reflections of them

These two people hold such a special place in my heart, they are the heartbeat of me, one gave birth to me the other I gave birth to. My Mom and I struggled in our relationship, even before she died 5 years ago things were slightly strained, we had come a long way but had not arrived, funny how after someone dies those things have no matter. I reflect back on my memories of my Mom, she was a legacy leaver even if I didn’t recognize it at the time she was doing it, her strength as a military wife alone makes me respect her even more now, she raised my sister and me most of the time in my Dad’s career military years all by herself, my dad was gone for most of my life courtesy of the Army and his many unaccompanied tours of duty. 

Mom had so much on her plate and did her very best to keep it together, a child with special needs, her own mother living with her and the care for her added to her list of duties an absentee husband, add to all of this her regular duties, housekeeping, childcare, driver, cook, and the list goes on, by the time she laid her head down at night she was exhausted. I wish I had respected all she did for us as I was growing up but if truth be told I didn’t thank her near enough or respect the sacrifice she made as both a military wife and mother. To say I miss my Mom is an understatement, I still go to the phone to call her, and now I cry out to God to be able to just talk to her one more time before her stroke and eventual death.

In the above picture, my Mom is holding our daughter, Sarah, this child was a gift from God, I was never supposed to be able to conceive let alone carry a child and there were so many circumstances that happened in her creation that can only be of God, she came a whole month early to the day, but Gods timing is always perfect so she was right on time and saved herself from being named Holly Noel, Sarah will now have been on this earth 32 years this coming Friday as of this writing, our beautiful daughter is one of the best gifts I have received thus far in my life, her Dad is another!

When Sarah came into this world, I remember telling my doctor I couldn’t have her yet, I didn’t know how I was going to pay for her. In my defence, I was on some heavy duty drugs due to complications, born with a cleft palate and harelip she weighed in at 6 pounds and instantly dropped to 4 pounds, figuring out how to feed her was a challenge but we had an incredible doctor, we navigated  the ins and outs of our local Children’s Hospital as Sarah went from being born in one hospital to going to a children’s hospital,

Her first year of life met with challenges of not gaining enough weight in her first year, several surgeries to repair her cleft palate and harelip, a month before her first birthday we found ourselves on the parent care unit at our local children’s hospital, Sarah was almost one and only weighed 13 pounds, she was failure to thrive, a common problem with children with her condition and leaving me feeling like the worlds worst Mom on planet earth. Sarah learned to walk two days after her birthday while in the hospital on that stay. Her life in the early years was spent in and out of the hospital, when she was 3 years old she contacted Spinal Meningitis, we spent a month and a half in the hospital and she gained the nickname of Wild Child from that stay.

Sarah’s early life was spent making friends during hospital stays and visits for check-ups, as she got older the visits and stays became less, her final surgery was her Senior year in High School on Christmas break and her nurse was one of the very first nurses she had from one of her first stays. Life has moved at warp speed since those days and Sarah has grown into this amazing woman, who I now also get to call my friend, to say her Dad and I are proud of her is an understatement, she went on to honor her early years of life by returning to the very same Children’s Hospital and now oversees the teams who oversee the entire Dance Marathons of Indiana for both colleges and high schools. Earlier this year (2018) she was honored by her employer ( The Children’s Miracle Network) as the first recipient of their new annual award for Dance Marathon  Person of the Year!

Summing up my thoughts on these to amazing women, the one who gave birth to me and the one I gave birth to. I thank you, God, that you thought the world needed one of me and for the people, you chose to bring me into this world. Thank you, God, for our beautiful daughter, I celebrate her, I pray I leave a strong legacy to her and those in my circle of influence and that we have instilled in her a love for you that she shares with others. God, I pray that she knows her identity is in you and that she also leaves a legacy of your love in this world.  Amen.

Happy Birthday to our beautiful, successful, loved daughter! Your Grandma was so very proud of you and the woman you have become and so are we.

Saved To Serve A God Styled Life,

Maggie P