Author: simplyhis16

Be still…

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When I was a little girl we played a game called Statue tag, the idea was someone was it and if they tagged you immediately you froze like a statue… The above picture reminds me of that game but also it reminds me of the scripture Psalms 46:10 ~ Be still and know that I am God.   Still is a place God wants us to be while waiting for instruction … Recently I had a Tonsillectomy you may think what does this have to do with the price of tea in China …well it has been in my time of recovery (As I write this…Now)  that God has spoken to my heart in a very deep and meaningful way… God knew that this was to be a quiet time for me and because He has the full attention I am gaining daily insight into His will for my life…
In the last 5 years, I have been that wayward child of God, floundering and reckless bad choice after bad choice with what seemed no end in sight… At one point I thought I would never turn back to God but Praise Him he didn’t give up on me… Each passing day brings new truth to me and God shows me through his word the plan He has for my life, A life of blessings overflowing… All because I am still and listening…
What does God want to show you?? Are you willing to be still and wait or do you rush ahead and miss His best??
Won’t you Be Still… And know that He is God Today and every day!!
Wait for His best, I promise it will be worth it!!
Repost from a former blog – August 2013
Saved To Serve, Serve To Inspire,
Simply Peg

Broken hearts, Broken trust.

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God in his wisdom created us for relationships, those relationships include parenting, marriage, and friendships and in those relationships we trust our hearts to be held by those we love, 20 years ago I trusted my heart to my husband Steve and he trusted me to hold his too however over these last few years I have broke that bond of trust and allowed others to take the place of that relationship.
For women it is easy when we are feeling neglected and someone else is showing us the attention we so desperately want from our spouse to transfer those feelings to another person showing us attention, this is wrong to do but an easy lie from Satan to fall into. It is so easy for lines to be crossed however innocent things may appear. Let me say that there is nothing wrong with men and women being friends and married men and women being friends with single men and women as long as those relationships are healthy and the boundaries are very clear.  God created us ALL for relationships, it is so easy even in the most innocent of relationships to cross a line whether it’s in your mind, with your word or conversations or physically. Sometimes mistakes are made that can forever change relationships, maybe the relationship will heal over time but in most cases they don’t, it changes things forever.
As in most of my post the things I talk about come from life experiences and this one is no different, I almost lost my best friend but even worse than that I almost lost my husband, I am truly a blessed woman to have a husband who woke up and smelled the coffee as the saying goes, he realized just how off kilter our marriage these last few years have been and that by neglecting our marriage that I was slipping away, now in all fairness and in all relationships it takes two so I was not blameless here either but it was so easy to just put my attentions elsewhere. I put My best friend and husbands relationship on the back burner for lack of wanting to try anymore, past attempts were meant without what I felt to be any response, truth is I don’t think either of us cared anymore, even buying a new home together didn’t seem to be the glue we needed to make it work.
God has a purpose and a plan for everything that happens in our lives I firmly believe this! I created some self-made drama that nearly ended my friendship with my other best guy friend, I would like to say that at this point he and I will be fine given some time apart and that will give me the much need time to refocus on my marriage relationship and rebuilding a firm foundation for Steve and me to stand on for the rest of our lives. I am thankful to God above that no lines were crossed with the said friend just some boundaries of trust that can be repaired and the trust rebuilt and when the time comes Steve and I can draw him into friendship together.
How does this tie into broken trust, broken hearts? God gives us our marriages and friendships and when something happens in those relationships that break the bond of trust, it also breaks the heart of God.  there has been a lot of talk in our house of how relationships should look like especially those with married couples who have single friends of the opposite sex… We have concluded these relationships should carry healthy boundaries, that time with said friends should mainly consist of a group setting, however having coffee or lunch is fine just not allowing any room for speculation… Also that these can be positive relationships especially if your single friends are looking to you as a married couple to help them find their future husband or wife. It breaks your friend’s hearts, God’s heart and even your own when boundaries are crossed and is even worse if lines are crossed because those are things that make the relationships change and not always for the better.
My said situation will be fine given some time to heal and move past it… As I said before God has a purpose and plan for everything that happens in our lives. I am tired of running from that plan and am now once and for all surrendering myself to God’s will… I will still stumble and fall from time to time but there will always be His purpose for it. God created us not only for relationships but for a purpose and that same very clear plan He had for me on a retreat of His design is the same plan He still wants for me now.
Your will be done God, not mine, please remove me from this season of disobedience into the test passing story you would have me to tell.
On a final and personal note, couples please if you are ever to a stage in your marriage that you feel you would be better apart I encourage you to seek accountability with another seasoned couple you trust to help you and hold you accountable also to not make any life changing choices for 30 days then reevaluate again in and repeat for another 30 days. Please feel free to contact me via email or by leaving your contact info on my blog for some very valuable resources that are working for my husband and I and that can prove to be a value in any marriage.
Repost from a former blog – February 2012
Saved To Serve, Serve To Inspire,
Simply Peg

The heart of the matter…

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Most of the drama I have created in my life comes from some very deep seeded insecurities. Why is it that I feel a need to compare myself to other women and point out what I am not?? It’s kinda a slap in the face to God. Part of my problem is I truly want to follow God but my insecurity tells me I am not worthy, how could he use me?? God has been very clear with me His purpose and laid on my heart the hearts of all women, we all have similar struggles and desire to be accepted by our peers, to be found beautiful in another’s eyes.
For me I think Beth Moore Christian Author and Speaker put it best in her book entitled So Long Insecurity, she say’s “A time comes in a willing life when you’re ready to face a Goliath -sized foe all by itself and fight to the stinking death.” and for me that time is now some recent bad choices have made me relize just how insecure I really am, it’s what is deeply rooted at the heart of the matter of all my bad decisions, especially as of late, it’s the BIG I , it takes many forms and isn’t always visible to the naked eye but never the less is always just hoving at the sufface whether I relize it or not. to the outside world it may appear I have all the confidence in the world but the truth is like many women and men too I want acceptance and long to have what I think others have at times.
Insecurity comes in many forms and is not always easy to recognize. The bigger question that Beth Moore poses in her book is quote”Whether or not our insecurities are substantial enough to hurt, limit or even distract us from profound effectiveness or fulfillment of purpose.” God has given us each a purpose, He has a plan for our lives, Are you allowing your insecurities to limit the fulfillment of those plans or are you willing to work through them to get to the root and move beyond them? Let’s look at the definition of insecurity: It refers to a profound sense of self-doubt, a deep feeling of uncertainty about our basic worth and our place in this world.
At this point, I don’t mean to keep quoting one of my favorite author and speaker’s but Beth is really on to something here and I have chosen to blog my thoughts on this what hopes to be a life-changing look at insecurity for me. Again the book is called So Long Insecurity by Beth Moore and this blog is on the first 3 chapters of said book, it has been very eye-opening for me and has helped me already to see why I have made some of the bad choices as of late, it is an area in my life that I need much healing in.
Please join me on this journey of self-discovery and revelation and of hope and healing!
Insecurity truly is at the heart of most issues for most of us especially in a woman’s heart, let’s unite and battle this Goliath-sized issue together.
Remember God is good all the time and all the time God is good!
Repost from a former blog – February 2012
Saved To Serve, Serve To Inspire,
Simply Peg

It’s the little things.

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This post is a sidebar post from my blogging about the book by Beth Moore called So Long Insecurity. In recent years my marriage has been on shaky ground at best, but recently it has taken a surprising turn for the better. I am in no way going to spend time pointing fingers at my husband, truth be told we have both been apart of the failed attempts to make things better that were however until now.
 
Let’s face it marriage is a four letter word and that word is one we don’t always want to hear but is the only one to describe it and that word is WORK! It is exciting and frustrating all at one time. The one true thing I know is this that without God at the center of your marriage if it doesn’t fail will sure make the work a lot less fun… Yes, work in and on a marriage can be fun!! My husband has really stepped it up as of late and it makes it so much easier for me to be submissive to his leadership in our home.
 
Yesterday I realized for the first time in a very long time how much fun it can be to hang out with him, I took a late lunch break and we went for a walk at our local park and later when I got home we fixed supper together and played a game, just turned off the TV and actually played a game.  this is the man and husband I have always wanted him to be to me. Please don’t misunderstand it isn’t always going to be like this every day of our lives but it’s to me what marriage is all about developing a true friendship with your spouse.
 
God has given my husband and I a final chance to really make this marriage work and it is up to us to honor God by creating the kind of marriage that is based on putting God first, your spouse/children( in that order) and then extended family and friends.. there have been so many life lessons these last few years and so many times I have ignored the voice of God when he tried to talk to me and when you are outside of His will that is so easy to do.
 
My husband is so good to me, much better than I deserve and out of respect for us both I will not blog about all the things that have happened over these last few years nor will I ever intentionally say something that will put my husband in a bad light. He has been and continues to be my rock and I am falling in love with him all over again. One of the little things he did recently that was so sweet may seem silly to those of you reading this but to me, it was a sign of just how much he does love me… 
I bought the wrong kind of antacids and had mentioned the kind I really like, the kind I had bought I am quite sure is pure chalk… Anyway, my husband remembered seeing the kind I  like in a box we had packed when we moved so he went to search for them and found them, brought them in and laid them on the bathroom sink for me to find.  Like I said this may seem silly to you but to me, it was just one of those small things that say I love you in a loud voice.
 
One of the biggest mistakes I made was not cultivating the friendship that had grown from our time apart. my husband and I had separated  a few years ago but that is when we truly became friends, our story wasn’t one of a fairy tale romance, we met, moved in together and married in about 5 months time and to top that off were instant parents so we never had just us phase of a courtship and marriage our daughter was already here when we got married. Once she was out of the nest we were strangers to one another because we had dove headlong into parenting our daughter that we really didn’t focus on us as much as we should have.
 
God has created us for relationships and wants us to be a friend to our spouse as much if not more so than we are with others. So no matter where you are in your marriages make time and take time to cultivate your friendship with your spouse because someday it will just be the two of you.  One of my favorite movies is the story of a couple that is told over and over by the husband to his wife because she has Alzheimer’s it’s called The Notebook and any self-respecting woman knows what I am talking about. My favorite scene is when he lays on the bed with her and the next day the nurses find them both there but they had gone home to be with the Lord.. It is also one of the saddest scene’s but how loving of the husband to tell his wife the story of their lives every day..
Awhile back I read a book called The Wednesday Letters which followed a similar storyline no one was sick or dying but it was a husband that wrote a letter to his wife and she, in turn, wrote him one and they would leave them for each other every Wednesday. I so want there to be evidence of a life of love spent together to leave for our daughter and grandchildren.
 
With each day that passes there is more to celebrate in my marriage and as we continually make God the centerpiece of our marriage I can only imagine how much sweeter life will be growing old with my best friend and partner in this life!
Repost from a former blog – February 2012
Saved To Serve, Serve To Inspire,
Simply Peg

Heartfelt Pain

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In Proverbs, it is put this way ” Each heart knows its own bitterness(14:10 ) Pain is an intense thing and at the time of going through it can make you feel like no one fully understands.  Because our personality, life experiences and even our history shape our response to any given situation, how we deal with that pain is different for everyone. Thinking back to some of the most painful times in my life such as being told I would never be able to carry a baby full term and then loosing the ability to bear a child almost devastated me but God in His infinant wisdom provided a void filler  for that deep black hole that was left by such devastating news in the way of a friend who opened a Christian Preschool at the time of my recovery and whom said Peg I think you would be a wonderful addition to my staff and would like for you to pray about coming on board… I did and was in that ministry for a little over 10 years. I now have so many children who’re lives touched mine and I pray in some way that I touched theirs as well.
As I talked about in a previous post, I nearly lost not one but two of my best male friendships both impart because of some bad choice making , never doubt that Satan isn’t alive and wreaking havoc on this earth because I am here to tell you he seeks to devour God’s children in any way possible. Somewhere in my fractured thinking I convinced myself there was more to a situation than there was, with all fairness to everyone involved  the majority of the problem laid on me, however Satan is a deceiver of many things and when you are far from God’s will it only makes it easier, after all, that is Satan’s purpose to draw you away from the will of God.
Feelings change even those we think are deep down in the gut. For me I convinced myself things were as I perceived them to be based solely on actions not on the words being spoken, I ended up hurting two wonderful men in the process and nearly destroying two wonderful friendships,  the saddest part is one of those was with my husband who should have been my first priority.
 This situation caused me some very heartfelt pain, praise God that all parties involved are taking some much needed time to heal from this situation and all will be well. The deep question in my soul is this, What deep seeded insecurity is there that would even cause me to react the way I did to said situation?? I really thought I had become this confident woman who no longer worried or compared herself to others but in a fraction of a second I flipped that switch and became this irrational woman who perceived even her closes female friends as potential threats, how off-kilter is that. I am a very smart, confident woman but in this situation I was not, I wanted something that A) I had no right to ask and B) was clearly wrong, I crossed a boundary and nearly lost it all.
The very sad thing that occurred is that I never again will have that closeness with either party involved but with God, all things are possible(Matthew 19:26) and there is a hope and promise that it will be even better.
Insecurity brings forth heartfelt pain but the good news is this, that God is bigger than any pain we have because while we were yet sinners He sent His Only son to die for us. I can ‘t even imagine what that was like for Him, I have an only child and I am here to tell you that it would absolutely destroy me if anything happened to her.
God’s words are filled with promises and hope for the heartfelt pain we go through,the thing to keep in mind is that He always wants our best in any given situation and when His answer is no it’s because He has something better in mind, as I always say He has a purpose and plan for everything we go through.
My heartfelt pain has been a time of mourning the lost closeness that took the place of the closeness I should have had with my husband and through this situation, my husband and I are taking the long road to recovery that will make us stronger and will make our friendships with others stronger as well because we will be grounded in God and not in self.
This is God’s do-over, His perfect plan for my husband and I, this time around we will do it His way and make sure to always keep God in the center of ALL that we say, do and think.
Repost from a former blog – March 2012
Saved To Serve, Serve To Inspire,
Simply Peg

 

 

What Matters Most?

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What Matters Most??
 
It is funny how one event can cause a chain reaction. Almost two weeks ago my husband and daughter were in a car accident, this alone would have been enough to change the course of events but the realization that I could have lost both my husband and daughter have really made me stop and think.
This one event has been a huge wake-up call for me and changes are coming as a result. 
 
The above picture was taken the day after Christmas this year, Steve and Sarah were outside clearing off the snow from my car, our now only vehicle until we go truck shopping for a new one for Steve… I love this picture of the two most important people in my life , I really don’t think I would want to do life without either of them in it, sure they gang up on me when Sarah comes home for a visit and they seem to have a closeness that most Fathers and Daughters have, but I wouldn’t trade any of that for anything in this world.
 
So many memories of my life so far are with them both at the center. Never take for granted the ones you love and always make time for memories.  This Christmas visit home for Sarah I am sure will be memorable what a way to be welcomed home for the holidays, go to Walmart for supplies and supper and get rear-ended and a trip to the ER via an ambulance. Welcome home for the holidays and glad you finally woke up to what is really important Peg, I didn’t think you were ever going to get it… That was God’s message to me.
 
In this season of Jesus birth let’s remember the true meaning of Christmas and John 3:16.
 
Don’t wait for a wake-up call to get what really matters most.
Repost from a former blog – December 2012

 

Saved To Serve, Serve To Inspire,

Simply Peg

 

What is your giant?

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(In this picture A Giant and my husband Steve)

   For me it has been my weight since we moved to Indiana when I was 10 years old I have used food to comfort me in almost every situation. Now that I am a grown up and can see the physical damage it has done to my body I have begun the uphill battle to lose this other person I have been carrying around for over half my life… it is so hard but I am going to win this battle. 3 years ago I woke up one morning and went to our local park and just started walking  my goal at that time was to do a mile a day at least 3 times a week so I would break that mile into 2-3 visits to the park in one day after I could do a mile in one day at one time I started increasing it to 2 miles and eventually got to 5 miles once a day 2-3 times a week but last summer I struggled with blood pressure issues and lost all the momentum from my start so now I am starting from the beginning and have added workout time with a personal trainer to help tone. This by far may be my biggest Giant yet as it will be one I will face every single day for the rest of my life.

 

   What brought me to the point of carrying a whole other person around with me is what happened to me in college, I was date raped but I couldn’t even admit that back then. I thought I had done something wrong and that if I admitted what happened it was because I caused it to happen. My thinking was if I am fat nobody will want me and I can just live in my own little world and not let anyone in.
   That would have worked until I met a guy who saw me from the inside out. Darn, the luck !! LoL  20 years later and he still sticks around. Not really sure why some days but he loves me and has seen me through some of the darker days. Food for me has always been a comfort, it was for my Mom too she is where I learned the habit of using food to comfort. She is now in the fight for her life literary at age 70 and that has become my reason for losing this extra person I want to live to see our daughter get married and have kids! so I need to do this no matter how hard that Giant fights me .. I know With God all things are possible! Matthew 19:26 Even this!! So stand back everyone and watch my Giant tumble to the ground!
Repost from a former blog – May 2011
Saved To Serve, Serve To Inspire,
Simply Peg

Calm Before The Storm

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Has there been a time in your life when you felt a sense of calm just before things really broke loose? The picture above was taken at Patoka Lake right before a night of very severe weather rolled in, my friend JB rode along with me on this photo shoot and when I was driving to pick him up tornado sirens were going off  but being the adventurous type that I am we plunged forward and drove to get the pictures anyway..
The old saying life imitates art is true.. not too long ago I had a clam before the storm moment in my life the sad part was I was the storm. The calm part of the situation was that I thought I had forgiven a friend for a poor choice on her part and we were moving past it but then the storm came and it had my voice and like storms in life it came from out of nowhere and with no thought to the path of destruction it might leave behind. I really had no idea I was capable of such venom and anger… I destroyed another person with my words and more importantly a friendship I may have said things that some of her other friends say behind her back (and they do because they have said them to me) but I was so very wrong to allow the storm of anger, hurt and bitterness to destroy and devastate another person least of all someone who I called friend.  In all my years on this earth I have never no matter how mad, hurt or frustrated I was with another person especially a friend caused such great hurt toward them that I can never recover the friendship yes I have had words but always chose to say little but this time just like a bad storm brewing I let everything I bottled up come flying out like a Texas Tornado and the saddest part of all is that I not only hurt her but others in the process.
Will I learn to forgive myself for my actions yes eventually I will, have I asked her forgiveness, yes I have and apologized to not only her but her fiance and Mom as well. I have to know idea to this day why I did what I did something inside me snapped and I was off. Deep in my heart, I truly wish no ill will toward her or anyone for that matter but just know that if your life is not in check with God’s will we can all be capable of causing storms. Lesson learned is to keep open communication with your family and friends and don’t let something fester so long that you become a storm in someone’s life because you didn’t tell them how something made you feel in the first place.

Repost from a former blog May 2011

Saved To Serve, Serve To Inspire,

Simply Peg

 

Reflections

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It is not so much the focus of the geese in this picture that I love about it but the reflection… Life does at times mirror art… God’s creation can mirror life and without God, we would have no life so I guess there is no can to it, however, life doesn’t always reflect God.  So many times I fall short of showing God to others and it is usually those times that I am not reflecting on God and His word that that happens.
Today as our pastor was speaking about the Beatitudes in Matthew 5 I thought about how they are guides for the Christian life and that believers need to reflect them. God says Blessed are they who… before each which tells me He truly wants to bless however our job is to follow the guidelines He has put before us. For some time now i have had a personal struggle that I knew if I ever started would be very hard to stop this has proven to be true but the times I am reflecting on God’s word first thing of each day I find that that struggle is less because I have given it to the one who says He will carry it for me the way He did on the cross!
This is a quote from a sign I painted a few years ago that says: ” Good morning this is God, I will be handling your day, I will not need your help so relax and have a good day Enjoy! how true this is if we would only do just that, I will admit I do have some control issues especially when it comes to thinking I can handle things in my own strength the before mentioned personal struggle is a prime example of this I know no I shouldn’t but I think I can handle it and do it anyway, what is it that Paul says to paraphrase: The things I should do I don’t and the things I don’t do I should. Darn that evil free will… It is both a blessing and a curse.
So as I end this time of reflection for another day I once again am reminded of my life changing verse: Psalms 51:8-14 and go to it often the above picture is a reminder to me to enjoy God’s grace and forgiveness and to rest and reflect on Him and Him alone.

Repost from a former blog – May 2011

Saved To Serve, Serve To Inspire,

Simply Peg